It’s hard to pinpoint when the American romantic comedy went in to therapy, though you must assume it was not long after filmmakers started hitting the couch, or at least cruising the self-help bookshelves. Five times on a studio time, romantic comedies involved a man as well as a woman engaged in delicate (or crude) power negotiations. The shrew had to be tamed & the boy had to grow up so they could handle her, or some variation on that idea. That template is still in use, though the banter that accompanied those negotiations has given way to speeches about feelings. Freud might have hit Hollywood decades earlier, but Woody Allen & the generations of funnymen & women they inspired, have a lot to answer for.
Someone involved in the making of “The Back-Up Plan,” a not very nice & yet painless waste of time, has certainly thought through some life & love questions. Written by Kate Angelo & directed by Alan Poul, the movie is essentially a vehicle for Jennifer Lopez, an appealing screen presence with a disappointing big-screen track record. That’s probably not all her fault: romantic roles for women often are the provenance of the bland or the blonde (Jennifer Aniston or Katherine Heigl) or the rare professional wisenheimer (Tina Fey). Angelina Jolie has a lock on the hard chick thing, something Ms. Lopez proved he could do beautifully in Steven Soderbergh’s thriller “Out of Sight,” her best movie to date.
That’s getting ahead of the story, though, which opens with Zoe being artificially inseminated in a fertility clinic by her jokey doctor (Robert Klein, of all people). Terminally single if not a lonely New York gal, Zoe owns a tiny pet store, has a wee disabled dog & five supportive employees (Eric Christian Olsen & Noureen DeWulf), who don’t seem to do over smirk indulgently & play the foil, much as Eve Arden did when movies about strong women in need of a stronger man starred Joan Crawford. Zoe also has a wise grandmother (Linda Lavin), who’s nice for some cutesy, gooey stuff at a retirement home. (Geezers say the darndest things.) But with her father & brother gone, Zoe also has abandonment issues.
“The Back-Up Plan” represents the first time that Ms. Lopez has headlined a movie since “El Cantante,” a 2007 release about the salsa musician Héctor Lavoe that he made with her husband, Marc Anthony. As a consequence, “The Back-Up Plan” isn’t a single woman, Zoe, who decides to have a infant on her own. It’s also about how nice Ms. Lopez looks after a few years off from the movies, during which he had twins & then — to judge from the lots of shots of her taut stomach, firm thighs & even a peek-a-boo look at her derrière — got back in to shape. If you think that’s an overstatement, think about that an entire scene involves a pregnant Zoe waxing rueful about her glorious posterior, as he brandishes a photo for evidence.
“The Back-Up Plan” is innocuous & unmemorable, & much looks like a lot of sitcoms do. It will scale down well on your tv, a medium that was made for close-ups of characters sharing & caring. With her sharply planed, mesmerizing face, Ms. Lopez was born for close-ups — though more stunning, sumptuous ones than are found here. It’s hard not to regret that this star hasn’t been given a more luxurious setting for her big-screen return, something that made the most of her charm & talents & gave her more to do than make you smirk (which you might do) & tear up (that ) as you marvel at the irresistible appeal of stories about people falling in love & of work at that sensational rear.
The complication comes in the form of a sensitive yet strong interloper, Stan (Alex O’Loughlin), who’s so perfect for Zoe that even his name rhymes with man. They makes farmstead goat cheese that they sells in the giant city, where they takes Zoe to dinner in a paradisiacal garden on Avenue B. (He’s a tiny bit country, a tiny bit soft, tinkling rock ’n’ roll.) They even drives a tractor without his shirt (or a farmer’s red neck), & talks thoughtfully about sustainable agriculture (). He’s so perfect that he’s perfect for Zoe, who pushes as they pulls, & pulls as they pushes, as they do the commitment tango. It’s a tricky dance that becomes trickier as Zoe’s belly swells & her emotions & hormones start crashing against her fears.
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